The kids are no longer kids. They have all gone. The number of animals has increased, but they are all outside. The downstairs feels lonely and unwelcoming.
The home has been wonderful and I guess I don’t want to give that up. This is the first house I have not wanted to leave. I out grew the others. I could not wait to move, but now I can feel the house wanting more than I can offer.
We use maybe a third of the house. We have so much stuff; it is turning into piles and those piles just keep getting larger. I feel guilty about this and wish I had time. I have always held the belief that a person’s mental state was shown in they way they kept their house. If the house was straightened up and tidy, they were equally straight. If the house was cluttered, they were cluttered.
Whenever I would get mad, the thing that settled me down was to clean my house. Cleaning helped me clean out my head and think clearly.
So now I am in clutter again, and I know I need to downsize. I want to do what is best for everyone; a win-win situation. I know I must let go of my dream home for both of our sakes. Knowing and doing are two separate things.
Why is letting go so difficult?
How do I accomplish something I know I should, but don’t want to do? I asked this question to the trees and the word “gratitude” came to my mind. I thought about that and slowly realized holding my home in gratitude in my heart will keep it with me. I can become excited for the new family who comes here and is loved and protected by the home and forest. I can feel excited for my next phase of life. I know that letting go will bring the luxury of not having to run off to a “job” everyday. I can let go of the dream house to get time for the dream job of helping people.
As I go about my days here, I feel deep gratitude for the years of peace and beauty. I am honored to have experienced the energy of this very alive home. I am beholden to the spirit here who awakened my soul. I pray the next family is equally inclined to listen to and care for this place which is sacred to me.
Is there something in your life which is hard to let go? Can I make a suggestion? Take some time and feel gratitude for whatever it is. Remember all the good things, all the lessons learned and feel where they live inside of you. You will have them always.
Letting go is not giving up…