From Ashara Morris, one of the bloggers on this site:
Last night I attended a women’s networking group in Denver, sponsored by one of the coaches I’ve worked with over the years. Let me digress for just a moment to say that I own my own business, and it has taken me a while to put on the CEO hat and really own the fact that I own the business. But I still don’t feel that much like a CEO. In my mind, that’s Howard Schultz, the CEO of Starbucks, or some other high-powered executive. My little 1 person show often, in my mind, doesn’t seem like it should even require a CEO. But that’s my title – along with Pet Psychic, certified EGCMethod(r) Coach, and Reiki Master. Many hats. The CEO one still doesn’t fit too well, but I’ve recently started embracing it a teeny bit more.
But back to that gathering. It is a group of executives and CEO entrepreneurs who are really making a difference in the world. The movers and the shakers, as it were, at least here in Denver. When I heard about it, I felt like that wasn’t my group of people, and I wasn’t going to go. Then I talked with a few women with whom I’d spent a year in a Mastermind. One has a business that is doing really well. A couple are still in startup mode. One is retiring from her day job the middle of February. All of them were attending. I gave this some more thought. My resistance was really up, and that’s when I realized I actually needed to attend. My inner gremlins were trying to keep me safe by telling me this was not my tribe. Well, let’s just set that gremlin straight. I paid my money, found something CEO-ish in my closet to wear, and headed to Denver.
I was easily the oldest woman in the room. That felt….strange. I’d never given it much thought before, but last night I noticed. (Oh, it’s the old lady gremlin!) When I arrived, I was given my name badge and told about the two stars on the front, that denoted the table I was to sit at to start the evening (color coded, very creative) and the one I would sit at for the break out session. I spoke with my friends, and the strangers at my table. I’m sure my vibe was a little off. After all, I’m “just” an animal communicator. This was, once again, those dang gremlins trying to keep me safe. And getting louder.
The breakout was in two parts. I got a glass of water and sat at what I thought was my designated table. But it wasn’t. Round one was back at the original table. I don’t know what it was about that, probably my “you must be PERFECT” gremlin, but I was mortified. I felt like an old lady who couldn’t keep a simple instruction in her head, and at the same time like I was 5 years old and couldn’t keep a simple instruction in my head. WOW. Thing is, I know what I was told at the door, and it didn’t jibe with what was actually happening. But rather than decide “oh well, it was just a misunderstanding” I folded into myself and was so upset I was almost in tears. Geeeeez.
Then a fairly good thing happened. At our table, we said what we did, what our hopes and dreams are for 2018, and then what the people at the table could help us with. I did that. I explained about how I help people understand their animals, how I wanted to change as many pet/people relationships as possible in 2018 and teach other people to do what I do, and then asked for help around the confidence to step into a lot of money coming my way. A woman at the table started asking about the problems I work on and the solutions I use. What? In the past, I would have been “the good girl” and just let her give me advice I didn’t really need. Last night, I stopped her, told her I did have a problem/solution statement (which was not what we were talking about), and that the help I was looking for was for my INTERNAL dialogue. The CEO in me pushed aside the gremlin who would have just let me sit there like a lump, very briefly raised her head and did what was needed to bring the conversation back to my actual appeal for help.
The bottom line: I will probably go again. It was uncomfortable hanging out with all that power, because I’m not used to it. But I won’t get used to it if I don’t hang out with it. On an empowerment call the next day, someone in the group posted this about someone else lamenting her many gremlins: “They get louder the closer you get to your own greatness.”
I must be getting close.