Acceptance, Hope and Balance

We are nearing the end of 2018. Astrologist Roy Neal pointed out that since August it has been a time of transition, healing and empowerment. It has shown up in powerful ways, individually and globally. Transition is a term used in giving birth. It can be a painful time. Most women forget the pain of birthing once a new life is brought forth.

My astrological chart clearly showed that this time for me was a transition of life or death. And so it was. By surviving surgical complications I escaped physical death or permanent disability. I did not know this was in my chart until I met with Mr. Neal for a reading and he pointed it out to me. My chart also shows that I “make it” into next year. Many things of the past did die with me as I lay recovering in a stroke rehabilitation hospital learning how to negotiate my new life of differing limitations. Since a blood clot damaged my spinal cord after a cervical fusion my unconscious perception of time and space and where my body is doesn’t function well. Fatigue makes it worse. Keeping balance not only in my body but my life is of utmost importance. Things that used to matter, no longer do. New lessons of rebirth are taking place.

Here are just a few new life lessons I learned about balance:

Self care is as important as caring for others. Each person is responsible for their own healing path. I used to hold healing for others. I carried it for them. I still can share what healing I have experienced, but ultimately each one has their own personal responsibility to heal. Healing can take a moment or a lifetime. I personally am grateful to have this opportunity to eventually leave this planet with the same spiritual wholeness I came in with. Putting my own healing first might set a good model for someone else to do the same. My nursing staff sent a thank you card saying I was pleasant and motivated. Yep- sure was! They even took me outdoors to the healing garden for my physical therapy, as I insisted nature was healing.

Holding space for healing has changed to creating space for healing. By releasing what does not resonate with me, and setting a clear boundary, it creates a space. What I have experienced and share may not resonate with someone else, and may even seem the polar opposite. I can let go now and wish them the best on the journey.

Coach Martha Keul once shared a coaching technique with me called “unpacking your backpack.” All of us carry with us on our back a sack of rocks. They could be limiting beliefs, obligations, mind sets, responsibilities, unfinished business, dependencies etc. It is a good idea to dump out that backpack and do an inventory from time to time. Decide if you really want to name and keep that rock or rid yourself of it. Lighten your load when you can. Laying in a hospital and relearning something you never had to think about before like walking or getting to the bathroom can really change whats in your backpack!

Forgiveness means more than letting go. It is actually giving something back that does not belong to you. If you are damaged because someone did something awful to you, why help them continue to damage you? Give it back! It is not yours, it doesn’t belong to you.

Balance is about self worth.  Relationships were always more important to me than money or material belongings. Having too much money or too little money is out of balance. People can also sacrifice themselves to hang onto a relationship and they become victims and martyrs. Balance is not self less or selfish. It is just self- who you uniquely are without all the over lays.  Having more material things that can be replaced may be easier than the pain of a failed relationship. Not having healthy relationships and suffering poverty is dismal.  It is also relative to each individuals circumstances. How I perceive things and my reality often differs from the next person. Hospital bills without insurance are monumental. It might mean life or death to someone. I firmly believe and practice alternative healthcare. Surgical intervention became a necessity. I have had to stand in my truth as to what my reality actually is.

As I continue healing I understand why my polarized shadow side is there. I can offer that same acceptance of others shadow side without judgment. I can’t obliterate things I don’t like or agree with. But I have a new found peace and I can choose what works for me and what doesn’t. I can agree to disagree and not take things too personal. I am not being personally rejected. I learned in a political discussion recently that even the darkest of times can become a catalyst to cure apathy and complacency and drive people to the light! History has shown that certain aspects are not good for the whole and eventually fail repeatedly. Some people in certain countries have spent their entire lives in dictatorships, not necessarily by choice. If I hang on to what does not belong to me I am my own dictator. I cause myself suffering when I could try something different. How can I relate in order to create health and well being in decision making, relationships and situations?

Letting go and releasing may not always be a process. Saying I am DONE, truly meaning it and not taking it back puts a quick end to internal debates. I often agonize over decisions, when a clear choice really lightens the load. I say YES now to ease and flow and what brings inner peace.

I was counseled by humble Mr. Roy to quit attaching guilt to my boundary setting. So now I am like the America’s Got Talent Show. “It’s a NO for me!” It might be someones cup of tea, but I don’t care for Chai! No guilt attached and it is not personal. What not might be for me- might be an opportunity for someone else to excel. Variety is the spice (Chai Tea) of life.

I have researched a concept referred to as Karmic Balancing. To simplify it, the night I was born the sign of Cancer was in transit and in opposition to who I truly am as a freedom loving Sagittarius. I left my childhood believing family, work and responsibility was the way I earn acceptance and self worth. There is no joy in that equation. I could not play, unless all my work and responsibilities were done. They were never done. I tried to fill in the space left by damaged parenting. Likely what my Mother called rebelliousness was just me trying to break the reins of restraint. I am often referred to as crazy. I am neither rebellious or crazy, my joy is the freedom to be me. Hence my love for horses and healing through coaching. What was acceptable to others was like cancer to the authentic me. I have hid my spirituality, love for freedom and my true belief system for most of my life. I thought I was protecting myself and others that I loved. When I am backed into a corner the freedom loving horse spirit fights or flees. No wonder I have such a deep connection with wild horses who are deemed worthless and of no value. Please don’t fence my spirit in. Roy Neal said that I should be a spiritual warrior for myself. I have decided to embrace my crazy!

As a child I learned that I was not worthy of material or financial support. My biological father abandoned me and never paid any child support. Never offered any support in any manner. My step-father was not my biological father and I was told repeatedly that he was not responsible for me. My Mother worked outside of the home to financially support two children. Work made her feel better about herself. Relationships failed her. Food was plentiful, but not material things. I over ate to relieve emotional pain. Relationships became very important to me. Money and things were for necessities and making ends meet. Relationships were so important that being extremely service minded was a result. I gladly gave away freely my education and life experience if it would help someone else to heal. Even if it cost me dearly. The person/relationship was more important than money or financial value. Relationship was priceless and of value. I only appear stoic on the outside.

Mr. Neal reminded me firmly that from now on I am to be treated fairly and with equity. This does not necessarily equate to financial gain, but that energetically I am worthy of a fair and equitable exchange for what I invest in others. Respect, appreciation etc. I was often left feeling like a failure when my love, compassion and life long learning experiences were outright rejected, ignored or not responded to. I always encourage independence in clients but I expect them to show up and participate fully.

Acceptance this year has to do with believing that things were not as traumatic as they seemed. What could have happened with a cervical fusion and complications was a very dark place. Hope is about how to get through this transition. Hope is about an eventual positive outcome and working towards it. Balance is about being determined that I will prevail in my new outcome or rebirth. It is time for my soul to break forth from the inside outward. Mr. Roy Neal even gave me a new definition for joy. I have been working for years on replacing grief in my heart with joy. Please note the term “working.” Who “works” on being joyful? Joy is a state of “Being.” My joy is simply the freedom to be me, embrace myself in my authenticity. I only need to lay down an energetic path of lightness for others to follow. I have been given a late in life opportunity to become more balanced. I can hardly wait to meet the new empowered me in 2019. I am sure that I will be recognizable as I will retain many of my positive attributes. Practicing love and compassion for self and others is balanced by discernment and clarity. Practicing balance is life sustaining, even as my body ages.

I will also begin offering New Reality coaching as part of my repertoire. This coaching is for those who have an inkling that something is shifting and want to explore and create a new reality. We will explore together all kinds of meta physical inspiration and take journeys into new dimensions.

As Disney character Buzz Lightyear says: “to infinity and beyond!”

Roy Neal is a professional astrologer with a private practice. Contact Roy at 720-962-4633.

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What in the World…..?

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A post by Ashara Morris, one of the Women Moving it Forward.

There has been a lot of unhappy things in the news lately, it seems. Our country is becoming Fascist; innocent people are being murdered for no reason other than someone doesn’t like their religious beliefs, or the color of their skin, or one of a hundred other “reasons”; animals are being thrown out of the windows of cars, or left to die on a road, or in a backyard.

All my life I’ve loved animals. I’ve always felt that people, for the most part, can take care of themselves, and if they can’t, they should be cared for. There are millions of caring, loving people out there who do their best for the humans who cannot help themselves. But the animals have no voice that most are willing to listen to – because if they did, they would be humbled. The animals don’t have much in the way of rights, either, but that’s another blog.

Let’s talk about hearing those animal voices, and how thoughtless some humans are to those species who can’t say out loud, “No matter what, I love you.”

I saw a post on Facebook the other day about a kitten who was thrown out of the window of a car. This happened in the county and state in which I live, and I have never been so saddened by an event. Tossed away like a piece of garbage. Discarded.

A LIFE.

TorbiAloysiusSmallWhat must those people think of themselves? How fearful they must be that they are so without value that it’s okay to devalue another life, and as a result feel better about themselves. I can tell myself that all day, and I mostly have compassion for those people who would throw a kitten, a living being, away like a piece of trash. Compassion is winning out over other, baser instincts – the part of me that wants to rip them to shreds, to toss them out a window and see how they feel. But what good would that do? It only serves to escalate the anger, the fear, the discombobulation we are all feeling during this time of great transition. Staying centered and trusting the Universe is paramount.

So I meditate. I pray. I let go of the anger, and I send those people, and all humans for that matter, Love and Light and the hope that some day they may listen to those small voices, who love us so much that they allow themselves to be tossed out of a car window to get our attention. Those small voices, those lives, and the lives of all the humans sacrificed, saying “Wake up! Wake up! Do you really want to go down this path again? Love one another. See yourself in me, a small furred creature, or a human with another color face. We are all the same. We are all part of God. Wake up!”

p.s. The kitten, for those who are wondering, was rescued, doctored, and has found a loving home.

p.p.s Happy birthday today to my mom, who would be 93 if she were still on the planet. She loved all animals, too, especially dogs and cats.

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Ashara Morris is an Animal Communicator and Certified Equine Gestalt Coach who loves all things furred, feathered, scaled, or whatever. She is President and CEO of Harmony’s Heart, LLC, home of Harmony’s Heart Coaching, Harmony’s Heart Animals, and The WindRider Project. Find out more about her and the work being done at Harmony’s Heart at www.harmonysheartanimals.com, www.harmonysheartcoaching.com, or www.thewindriderproject.com.

I’ve got to…

How many times do you say, “I’ve got to do this…”?

How does it make you feel? Obligated? Forced? Maybe sometimes even resentful?

What if you changed the language to, “I get to do this…”?

Very different feel, right?

There are so few things that we “have to” do, and so many that we choose to do, perhaps not recognizing that we had a choice.

We can choose to cook dinner, pick something up or go out. We don’t “have to” cook. Perhaps we weigh the options and decide that we’d like to cook dinner for reasons of economy or health. Perhaps we decide to pick up fast food for reasons of convenience. Or we go out for dinner for companionship. Do you really “have to” cook?

Spending time with your friends and family is something I hope you “get to” do, rather than “have to” do. If you feel you “have to” spend time with them, I suspect your relationship needs some work so that you can create a space where you enjoy their company. Perhaps your personal boundaries aren’t being appropriately drawn or defended. There is possibly a personal development lesson in this relationship of obligation that could help you with other relationships.

I “have to” feed my animals on a regular schedule. However, if I can recognize that I “get to” spend quality time with them each day, caring for them and enjoying their company, it feels so much better.

“I’ve got to” or “I get to”. The choice is yours.

Inktober

We are 22 days into October and I have drawn 22 days in a row!! Why?  Inktober, that’s why! What is Inktober? Well, Inktober was created by Jake Parker in 2009 to improve his own inking skills.  It has since become a worldwide occurrence to celebrate ink and thousands of artists participate each year. Basically,  it’s 31 days, 31 drawings.  Each day has a word assigned to it and the words are rather random.

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Day 5: Chicken

Our local Chamber of Commerce tweaked the rules a bit to include pencil drawings, thank goodness!  They also added a prize!  Participants who post their drawings to Facebook all 31 days with the hash tags #Inktober and #InktoberCarbonCounty will be entered into a drawing.

When I saw the post in late September, I thought, “cool, that’ll be fun.” It’s been so much more than that!

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Day 17: Swollen

You see, I’m an artist, have been all my life.  However, that piece of me was buried for many years.  My mother-in-law did not like my art and to avoid the constant judging, dirty looks and rude remarks when she entered my home, I took most of my art off my walls and stored it in the basement.  I didn’t paint and rarely even drew for the 10 years I lived next door to her.  Since moving to Wyoming in 2009, I’ve been rediscovering that piece of me, uncovering it layer by layer.

What began as a simple, fun exercise has reawakened a part of me in ways I never imagined.  I spend 10 – 40 minutes on each drawing.  Some words have been easy, others have been difficult.  I don’t “love” every drawing and I’m OK with that.  That, too, was growth as I used to expect every drawing to be perfect or I’d tear it up! Whether it’s good or bad,  I’m putting it out there for the world to see!  This simple exercise has also gotten me through some very stressful days. I’ve been able to take the word for the day and create a drawling that represents where I’m at in that moment. For instance, on day 7 the word  was “exhausted “.  By then I was several days into making my daughter’s wedding dress with a deadline of the 10th! Exhausted was an understatement! 20181007_1929511This was the drawing I created to reflect that.  I was able to smile and let go of the exhaustion in a way that allowed me to continue. The dress turned out beautiful and was a perfect fit.

As October comes to a close, I may have to find a way to continue this on my own.  I may not do it every day but I definitely want to continue to feed this part of me!

Loving Inktober!

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Day 6: Drooling

How You Do Anything…

Posted by BB Harding, member Women Move It Forward blog

For years, I have heard the adage “How you do anything is how you do everything.”  Usually, it went in one ear, registered momentarily, dropped into nah, and went on out the other ear.

Throughout the last couple of months, I have been in situations where that very phrase popped up more than once.  I have a rule of thumb, that if I hear something three times (or more), there is a possible message in there for me to look at.

For the past two weeks, I started paying closer attention to see if there was any veracity for me in that statement.  It was easy for me to literally say, I don’t do everything the same way, so what do they mean?  One of the “messages” was in the context of “tell me how you eat dinner, and I will tell you how you do anything.”  Another context “how you do your homework is how you do everything.”  And yet another was literally about doing tasks – “how you do a task is how you do your life.”

Ok this was food for fodder, so I decided to take a look at this.  Obviously, it wasn’t a literal statement, yet maybe there were some common threads.

At the time of the “eat dinner message” I can say that my normal mode was to go grab something, slap it together, and then eat on the run, or while I was doing something else (aka, multi-tasking).  I frequently ate directly from the pan and seldom used “real” dishes (why waste the time and have to cleanup after?)  And I seldom took the time to make something hot (too much trouble).  It was easy to have a few take aways on this one.  I am too busy to take proper care of myself; I look for what is easy to do; I don’t take the time to press the pause button and do something else; too focused on getting things done (or not); that there were things that just weren’t that important to me; I had various notions about keeping productive and efficiency.  One of the other contributors to not sitting down to eat was the fact that I really didn’t have any place to do that.  I could have made a spot on the desktop by pushing my computer out of the way, and I did do that a handful of times.  One of my efforts since I moved to my new place has been to take the time to put food on a plate and sit at the table to eat. Sometimes I do nothing else, and much of the time, I am having some Netflix on in the background.  It is still hard to do absolutely nothing other than eat.

Last week, I was cleaning the front windows on the house.  I was removing the screens, washing down the windows, vacuuming out the dirt in the sills (I wanted to be able to see the view, afterall).  I became aware that I was really taking my time in doing the task.  Not rushing, doing a “good” job; being present to the task.  I started reflecting on this. What is it that has me doing some things more thoroughly than other things?  What causes me to deep dive or skim the surface?  Some say I am meticulous to a fault; I often feel like I am not deep enough.  Some thoughts began to emerge.  If I REALLY like something, I will immerse myself in the topic to find out more.  If I’m ho-hum about it, I will stay on the surface.  What if I have to get something done and I don’t like it?  I work on it, am frequently diverted, and it often gets done at the last possible moment.  What if I have to get something done, and I don’t know how to do it? I struggle with it.  I will research the topic –“what does it mean?”  “What have others done?”  “What can I learn from this?” I’ll fuss with it; I’ll seek answers from others and typically will be dissatisfied with their answers. Other times I will be blown away with a response that makes it all obvious.  Overall, I’ll attempt to apply various learnings and theories that I have come up with to see if I can arrive at a solution.  I know when I am struggling (like what to write for a blog), I wonder how good is “good enough?”  or “when enough is enough?”  Then there is the part under this that says “what if my best is not good enough?” What then?”

I throw out the question about what is my conditioning around this?  A couple of things come roaring to the surface – “Anything worth doing, is worth doing well.”  “Do a good job.” “If you are going to do it, do it right.” “You need to put in 100% (or more) to get the job done.”  “You should be able to figure this out on your own.” “There are times you have to do things you don’t want to do because it is for the greater good.”  “Don’t be sloppy about how you do things.”  “People will judge you on the way you do things.”  “Just get it done…because I said so!”  “Quit whining and get it done.” “A child could figure this out.”   OK, enough.

So, where am I with this experiment?  In the midst for sure.  I have learned a few things

  • It appears that I generally lack a sense of mindfulness in the things that I do.  Many things are done in multi-tasking mode; lack of full attention to the activity that I am doing.
  • How I approach doing something is contingent upon what s happening within me.
  • I have made inroads on caring for self, and yet there is much more to do.  Allowing myself breaks; doing things only for me (e.g. a meal); slowing down and being more present.  Allowing time and space into my life.
  • If I really like something, or really want to know – I will immerse myself, maybe even “work hard” to find out more.  It would be appropriate to note that “work hard,” in this case, doesn’t feel like “working” hard.
  • Conversely, if I don’t like something, don’t want to do something I will allow my energy / mind to wander; allow interruptions; fail to focus; struggle with getting the task done.
  • At times, I have no real commitment to doing something; this would fall more appropriately into the category of “I want to” be more committed in that area.
  • I find myself curious about a couple of things – would I be willing to commit to doing something for a period of time?  Something I like as well as something I don’t like?  Taking on a mindful, self-honoring approach.  Another inquiry:  would I be willing to only do things that I really liked or genuinely wanted to know something about?  This would require jumping past doing things because “I have to do them,” “I should or ought to be doing them.“

Going forward with this experiment, I am focusing on inducing more mindfulness into the way that I do things, and see where that will take me.  This feels as if it could be something that I share about again in the future.

How do you do anything?

Friendship

“He who returns from a journey is not the same as he who left”.

Summer has come to end. The heat and rain of 2018 will be long remembered, but most memorable will be my 2680 mile road trip. As I mentioned in my previous blog I did not go to any exotic location. My trip was charted by destiny. It started with me placing pins on a map of where old friends, horses I knew and relatives still lived throughout the eastern US. It also included seeing old homes, special roads or views that I loved.  I learned that my bones take a bit longer to straighten out after being in a car for any length of time, but my eyes were just as bright exploring new roads and re-experiencing old trails.

The last part of my trip took me to SW Pennsylvania. The scenery; hills of green, winding rivers and forest so lush and thick they were intoxicating, brought me back home.   I visited my old work place and got caught up with my co-harts.  I rode horses down familiar trails and even went to visit my old homestead(s). It was nostalgic and a bit sad, but clearly evident to me that the home and land was no longer part of whom I was.

But one thing, above all stood out to me on this trip. One evening my girlfriend got all the other ladies together that I knew.  When I lived there I was part of a monthly “horsey girl night out” where we shared stories about our horses, training we learned about or brought a video or two to discuss. I loved this group of women but really didn’t imagine I’d be able to see so many of them during my stay. When I walked in, I briefly looked around and took note of their changes and then there I was. Again, smack in the middle of stories, laughter, crying and hugs. I had to pinch myself to remind myself that I was no longer a regular part of this group.

What made this group just like going home to family? I quickly realized that it was not necessarily the monthly get togethers that bonded us, but really quite more.  We all had been there for each other through snow storms, loss of electricity, helped each other with sick or injured horses, rode the hills together, vacationed with our horses together, lifted each one up when a job was lost, a child became sick or a family memeber died.  We loved each other just as much for our faults and as our virtues. We had seen the worse of each other, the quirky sides and even the best from time to time. Is this what binds a family, a group, a village or nation I mused about during those 2 1/2 weeks on the road?

For me, growing up in a military family and moving often, I used to believe that the wonderful places I experienced overshadowed the many, many friendships I made. I was wrong. Here was a group of strong, independent women that became my family for only 12 years and yet when we met again after 5 years, we were as connected as ever! Most other people, I suspect know and understand the value of friendship and may not even questioned or think much about it. But for me the profound ability to reconnect and not be the one looking from the outside in (as was my regular pattern) was amazing and something I will cherish always.

To friendship!

Barbara is the owner and president of Wayfinding with Horses, Inc.  She is trained in the Equine Gestalt Coaching Method, a retired Professional Engineer and Qi Gong Instructor but mostly she is a woman passionate about horses, their wellbeing and their gift of being present. The horses help her clients to trust their true nature and lead from the heart.  Clients often report a heightened awareness of their surroundings and others while experiencing a deeper, more profound understanding of their relationships and connection to others.  Barbara lives at Wayfinding Farm, located near Ocala Florida.

Awesome Pie!

 

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Photo credit: https://www.piesareawesome.com/

Written by Carroll a member of Women Move It Forward Blog

Have you ever had a conversation with someone where they were so passionate and positive about their topic that you could not help getting the feeling I want some of that? I have and then re-counting the conversation to someone else with equal passion the words just came to my mouth: “I want some of that awesome pie!”

I recently have been thinking about that situation and how great it felt. And it got me to wondering, why is it when a person speaks to me about an event it actually comes to life? Whereas looking at a website or Facebook post or any other visual media provides a rather bla experience in comparison…

I believe the answer is trust. Even if it is someone I don’t know; if they are so excited about the event that it just bubbles fourth, I trust that the event had value. The feeling is stronger if it is from someone in my circle; people who are like me. People with similar tastes. That is when I really step up and say where can I get a slice of that awesome pie?

I went on a trip to Peru a few years ago to ride horses up through the mountains. I cannot speak the language, yet I jumped at the chance to do this. Why? Because the person setting it up was someone I knew and trusted. I knew they had experience with  the country, and I knew it was a once in a lifetime opportunity. That trip changed my life! It showed me how capable I am, and how much joy can come from trusting. Trusting the horse, the trail, my balance, the Universe, and ultimately myself.

I think an interesting thing about awesome pi is that each slice contains something different. They may all have the same main ingredient, but each slice has additional ingredients not in the others.

I am in the process of learning how to make awesome pies. What does that look like? I start with something incredible that happened in my life, and I start talking about how it felt and what meant to me.  If the person listening provides uninterested feedback, I thank them in my head and save that slice of pie for someone else who is hungry. There is nothing wrong with being full. When someone has awesome pi to share with me, I get my fork out in anticipation.

If I can make a suggestion, I would ask you to create your own recipe for awesome pie… Start with something that moves you, then sprinkle in a little of the surrounding environment, and top it off with what you got out of it…

and then share…

Redefining Success

Whenever I see a riding client of mine becoming tense and frustrated on their horse, I ask them to pause what they’re doing and define success for themselves in this moment. The mental tension of striving for a goal that is at the moment out of reach, causes muscles to shorten and bodies to stiffen in ways that dramatically reduce performance. As soon as a more appropriate goal is defined, the rider can resume the calm focus that they need to ride well, enjoy themselves, and relate well to their horse.

As with everything I teach, what I teach, I also need to learn. Sometimes over and over again.

While having dinner with a close friend a few weeks ago, I was struck to realize that my definition for success in my working life is several years out of reach. And moreover, that I have been hitching a level of satisfaction and happiness to that goal that, frankly, I’m not willing to wait that long for.

My goal was causing me to feel like a failure. And I’m all for big goals—I’m certainly not letting go of my big goals and dreams, but goals have to have an appropriate time frame attached to them. And mine was most definitely not.

So I’ve been taking some time with myself to redefine my goals and my definition of success for a day, a week, a month, and a year. I’ve been listening to that strong voice inside that says I’m not willing to use stressful striving to drive my motivation anymore. I’m choosing to be happy and satisfied with my life exactly as it is, which brings me deeper into appreciation, gratitude, joy and all the good feels.

I am blessed. I live in a beautiful home with my furry family who bring me deep and abiding joy. I live in a neighborhood that I love, just down the street from lifelong friends. My neighbors all wave and stop to talk as they walk by with their dogs, their kids in strollers, or on horseback. There are buffalo across the street, donkeys around the corner and sometimes my neighbor two streets over takes her miniature horses out for a drive, the pair of them pulling carts. This is a charmed life I’m living.

I have a loving, supportive family and we are blessed with good health. I get to work for people and horses I love, in a way that is creative, juicy, playful and grounded in good science. I get to work with children, learning from them, supporting them and making a difference in their lives.

Success is right here, right now, in this rich and abundant life I’m living. The big goals will have their day, in one form or another, and until then, I get to walk this walk, enjoying each and every step along the way.  Aho.

How do you define success for yourself and how does your belief about success shape your life?  I’d love to hear.

Wishing you all abundant blessings,

Emily

Creating Space

In the meta-physical healing world, we often use the phrase “holding space.” In essence we are holding space for the individual, situation or set of circumstances to work itself out to the highest possible outcome. We are holding that the vast wisdom of the Universe and the powerful divine energy field expand and manifest in ways we don’t even imagine. We look for shifts and insights and movement to the out workings beyond the difficulty. This is not passive- but active. We might also ask for whatever the person needs at this time to be given to them. Perhaps it is strength or courage or healing, stamina or endurance. Perhaps we ask our angels and guides to team up with other Beings in alignment with the person or circumstance.

People often ask me to hold space for them. I gladly do so. I show up in ways that I can for them, but I rely heavily on the unseen energetic Beings and the energy forces of the Universe to do the heavy lifting.

I have had my own health issues in recent months. This required three spinal injections of steroids to reduce inflammation. I do not like to even think about a needle so close to my spine. Soon I will be having a cervical spine fusion. Fusion to me infers lack of mobility- which seems a negative connotation.

However, I giggled out loud after the first injection. They explained that they were trying to “create space” around the nerve that was being pinched by reducing the inflammation. I love this concept about creating space! Right away I thought about how the Universe is not stagnant- it is constantly moving and expanding. Are we not microcosms of the Universe? Can we create space within? The spinal fusion will actually “create space” so that the pressure on my nerves, spinal cord and the stenosis causing pooling of spinal fluid and a lack of it traveling to my brain will be corrected. Yes- I will experience some lack of mobility in my vertebrae. Right now I actually have too much movement and instability in those areas. The cushions and stability lost due to disc degeneration will be stabilized. Bone spurs have developed as an attempt to stabilize the disc degeneration, but the bony growths are poking my spinal cord. This will create space for me to have a better quality of life, instead of continuing to deteriorate.

A client recently was having somewhat of a meltdown. She asked me “where, where was her courage located in her body?” I paused a moment collecting my thoughts and was about to proceed to discuss energetically about where courage was located in the Chakra system. Before I could open my mouth she declared profoundly that she knew- her courage was located in all the in between spaces where she hadn’t been looking!

My pause created a space so they she could allow her own answer to rise up from within her. I created space and she created space. We were not holding onto anything. It went from passive to taking action. I had a shift in consciousness. So did my client. I now create space instead of holding space. It seems so much more expansive. I am not holding anything but creating and reflecting inner and outer space. It creates energetic movement, and allows what needs to happen. See if you can create a paradigm shift!

Note:  On August 22nd, I had cervical spinal fusion surgery.  While in recovery, I developed a complication.  A blood clot/hematoma formed behind the surgical repair.  I lost the nerve response in my legs.  Emergency surgery removed the clot and cleaned up the area.  I was later sent to a rehab hospital to re-learn how to walk.  I am still off balance and wobbly.  I also have swelling and nerve deficits through my left shoulder, arm and hand.  I am going to out patient physical therapy twice per week. I am “creating space” around healing and recovery.  I am told that I have been a pleasant patient and that I am motivated.  As per my previous post, I was willing to accept, adapt and release.  If you feel motivated too, please take a silent moment to create space around healing and recovery too.  Thank you!

What or Who?

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Posted by Ashara Morris, one of the Women Moving It Forward on this Blog.

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Our society today takes great pride in, and raises up, those who do, do, do. If you’re not doing, you’re not producing, therefore if you’re just “being” you will be passed over or ignored or even denigrated.

I’ve noticed this when meeting people for the first time, and I’m guilty of it as well – we ask “What do you do?” We want to know about what this person does in our workaday world, not necessarily who they are. But which might be the more important question?

What do you do?

or

Who are you?

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I am fascinated by people, by how they think, how they feel, the opinions they carry. They are a constant source of revelation to me, not only about them, but about myself. If I ask someone “what do you do?” they’re going to tell me about their job, and that’s fine, because certainly it’s part of who they are, and if they love their work, that will be a good indicator of who they might be. But the question “Who are you?” is much more interesting to me. And, I think, also scary for the person being asked.

We live with a lot of masks in place. Even the most authentic person has to sometimes remove the “I’m being authentic” mask to be who they REALLY are. It’s an amazing dance. So we have to learn about people in kind of a sideways fashion – mostly by starting with “What do you do?”

I’m sure those of you reading this know what you do. But who are you? Are you sensitive? Are you afraid of the dark? (I always leave a light on when I’m home alone over night, even though we have four dogs to help me stay safe.) Do you think everyone is out to get you? Or maybe just a few people? Do we live in a friendly or unfriendly world? How do you relax? Do you like to read? Do you draw? Do you enjoy just sitting?

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Favorite TV show? What did you think of school? Did you enjoy it? Or was it painful? And why? What was enjoyable or painful?

Those are just a few of the questions that go through my mind when I’m getting to know someone, and even when talking with old friends, because friendship doesn’t happen in one fell swoop – it is a matter of years, and layers, and the unveiling of some new aspect of a friend is like a gift wrapped in shiny paper and topped off with a beautiful bow – how amazing we all are!

If you want to know more about me, ask me – who are you? And I will tell you. Be prepared though, because I will ask the same of you. I don’t need to know about your job – who are YOU?

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Ashara Morris is sensitive, intuitive, and laughs a lot. The glass is generally half full. She talks with animals, plants, rocks, her car quite a bit, and sometimes even her favorite green chair. You can find out more about what she DOES at www.harmonysheartcoaching.com and www.harmonysheartanimals.com.